Self-editing for authors
BLOG WRITTEN BY DONNA PARKER
by PHOENIX OASIS PRESSLost in the Weeds?
You’ve written your first draft of a short story, novella, or novel. The common advice: rewrite the second draft to make it better. That includes considering characters, plots, arcs, climaxes and satisfying resolutions. But it also includes what I call getting lost in the weeds. A golf metaphor which literally means looking for a little white ball in a mass of weeds hidden under the trees.
As you start rereading your manuscript, you may get lost in the weeds, in a thicket of bad or poorly written grammar, and get frustrated thinking your story is bad. It usually isn’t the fault of the story. Maybe it’s the words.
A Few Simple Tricks
Try these tips to make your draft first reader ready.
Know the difference.
Between its and it's. Between there, they're, their. Between your, you're.
“There was….”
Don’t use this to start sentences. Just don’t. Please don’t.
Go on a was hunt.
Search and find every ‘was’ in your manuscript and replace them with simple past tense verbs.
She was walking becomes She walked.
Replace general verbs with stronger ones.
She walked becomes She strode. (Or She tiptoed. She skipped).
Delete ideations (mental thoughts): “She thought.” “He wondered.” Nine out of 10 times they’re unnecessary.
She thought if he loved me….might become If he loved me, he’d buy flowers.
He wondered would she date me? becomes Will she date me?
Prepositions. One easy way to tighten up a sentence is to delete to and for clauses.
Will you do this for me? becomes Will you do this?
My favorite technique with adjectives and verbs: Cut them down.
Remember that 1+1=2 only applies in math. In writing, think ½ whenever you find two adjectives or an adjective + verb.
Try using just one—the one most important to the story.
Note: While this technique is great for short stories, in novels you can usually get away with more adjectives, especially in fantasy and romance genres.
Redundancy. If you used a word once, don’t use it again in the same paragraph.
Symmetry. Use similar nouns, adjectives, and verbs in a sentence.
CHANGE THIS: In the forest she found red roses, a black tree, and a discarded shoe.
TO THIS: In the forest she found red roses, black mossy trees, and green thorn bushes.
Cliches. Avoid them. Please.
The boot stood out like a sore thumb.
Sore thumbs are red and throbbing and painful. Shoes are not. Rewrite it.
Alliteration. A little goes a long way.
Alliteration is the repetition of beginning sounds, and it can give writing a soft rhythm. It’s often used in poetry, but too much may overwhelm your prose. A little goes a long way, so choose wisely:
CHANGE THIS: A soft trail of shoe prints sunk deep into the swamp.
TO THIS: A crusty boot left behind in the swamp.
Dialogue tags. Use them sparingly.
Let the dialogue carry the weight unless the tag conveys a different idea from the sentence. And don’t use two dialogue tags when one will do.
CHANGE THIS: “Get out of here. Right now,” she screamed.
TO THIS: “Get out of her. Right now.” (Screamed is implied, so the dialogue tag is unnecessary.)
OR THIS: “Get out,” she whispered. (Whispered is unexpected, so the tag is useful.)
CHANGE THIS: She whispered softly.
TO THIS: She whispered.
These are some of my favorite tips for better writing. Need more?
Your Complete Guide to English Grammar, from Grammarly.
ABOUT DONNA PARKER
DONNA IS A VERITABLE GO-TO FOR ALL THINGS GRAMMAR, STRUCTURE, AND PLOT. A KIND SOUL WITH AN EYE FOR PRECISE WRITING, SHE’S BEEN AN EDITOR FOR 20+ YEARS. ALSO IN THE WORKS: HER FIRST SPECULATIVE FICTION NOVEL. PS: SHE’S SHARING HER WISDOM AT POP’S UPCOMING 2024 WRITERS RETREAT — RSVP HERE!